Purpose: To improve the health of marriages and families in the Siouxland area through the Gospel of Jesus Christ.
How Long Should Someone Date? - Devotion 8
Proverbs 19:13
A foolish son is his father's ruin, and a quarrelsome wife is like a constant dripping.
I have known people who have dated one week and then married and stayed together all their life. I have also known people who have dated for ten years, married and stayed together life long. The key to either situation is commitment. If there is no commitment then neither person should attempt marriage. It will surely fail. If the marriage is merely for sex it will most surely fail because sex can be found with other people. If the marriage is merely happening to raise a child, as soon as the child moves out the marriage will end. Marriage is commitment built on God joining two people as one.
I personally would argue that it is okay to date multiple people. In fact, the more people you get to know the more you will learn about people. You will learn new ways to think about the world. You can learn from anyone something. You may learn, this person is not for me!
Another fallacy is the thought, "If I date them and get married I can make them a Christian." This almost never happens. Or the thought, "If I keep dating them I can change them to be more like the person I want them to be." Unfortunately, you can not change a person in marriage. In fact, often during dating a person will change what they are like to please the other person. For example, while dating Bill cleaned up his room to please Suzy. But after they got married, Bill's room was always messy. Suzy complained to know end. Yet, if Suzy had asked Bill's friends and really gotten to know him she would have found out that he was messy all along.
There is an old true saying, "You get what you get."
Prayer: Lord Jesus, help me not to be a future dripping spouse. Help when I date to be who I am with the other person and not pretend to be someone else. In Jesus name. Amen